Irish Inside

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An old Irish recipe for longevity: Leave the table hungry. Leave the bed sleepy. Leave the bar thirsty.

In life, there are only two things to worry about, either you are well, or you are sick. If you are well, there is nothing to worry about, but if you are sick, you have two things to worry about; either you will live, or you will die. If you live, there is nothing to worry about, if you die, you have two things to worry about; either you will go to heaven or to hell. If you go to heaven, there is nothing to worry about, but if you go to hell, you'll be so busy shaking hands with your friends, you won't have time to worry!

May you die in bed at 95 years, Shot by a jealous wife!

May there always be work for your hands to do, May your purse always hold a coin or two. May the sun always shine warm on your windowpane, May a rainbow be certain to follow each rain. May the hand of a friend always be near you, And may God fill your heart with gladness to cheer you.

Here's to a long life and a merry one. A quick death and an easy one. A pretty girl and an honest one. A cold beer -- and another one!

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[ Irish Inside ].

Here's to our wives and girlfriends: May they never meet!

May you have length with your days, and strength with your step, and may each season have a reason to celebrate your faith in mankind!

From the County of Meath, the health of the hag. Not of her but her drink is the reason we brag.

Here's to health and prosperity, To you and all your posterity. And them that doesn't drink with sincerity, That they may be damned for all eternity!

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